Beyond The Build

EP31: How High Performers Process Feedback

Uma Abu and Ope Osunkoya

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0:00 | 40:41

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In this episode of Beyond the Build, we break down one of the most uncomfortable but important parts of being a software engineer: receiving feedback. We get into why feedback hits so hard, especially for high performers, and walk through what it actually looks like to receive it well. Not just smile and nod, but genuinely process it without spiraling, defending yourself, or mentally checking out. We cover how to separate feedback from your identity, what to say in the moment when you want to argue but shouldn't, how to tell the difference between real signal and noise, and how to turn even vague or frustrating feedback into something actionable.

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